Clearing

Yes, I’ve been gone for a while.

During this absence, I’ve been wanting to write to you.

But I didn’t have anything to write…

…nothing I’d thought would be meaningful.

This past weekend was an emotional one. Thank you to the Super Full Moon…in Scorpio for the emotional upheaval. Not to mention that my moon sign is also in Scorpio. >.<

Anyway, a lot came up, and I had to clear a lot.

The Book of Ages…well, if you read it you’ll get a glimpse into what I’m trying to say here. I came clean to myself, my mother, and my sister [whom I adore and cherish].

Unhappy for the majority of my 27 years, I lived a life that was not supposed to be.

I’ve learned from it – since we all are here to learn something – I think I came to that point where it was time to truly move forward, and I needed to release the lie I created.

It hurt. It hurt to wear it and it hurt to live from it.

To be one authentic in my artwork, yet try to downplay it in front of those closest to me – all because of past hurts; all because I wasn’t understood in the past; all because of not believing in myself from way back when.

.:.heavy sigh.:.

Anyway, all of that was released. Tears were shed, and I apologized  – to them and to myself. I asked for forgiveness – from myself and from mum and sis.

But I also feel that the upheaval was a catalyst for them too. A catalyst of change, movement…into being.

And yeah, that’s part of my mission as well…being a bona-fide catalyst. It’s just what I am.

I destroy worlds so that new ones can be created.

There’s so much depth to that statement. Take the time to understand what it means. It’s in my work, it’s in my being, it’s in my signature.

It’s why I came here.

And Art is my tool of choice [or…weapon of choice, depending on how you look at it ^_^].

You, my readers, have not seen the lie I’ve created,

I am glad. You’ve only seen my internal burn for truth.

And you will continue to get it.

 

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